I cannot speak for women, as far as all that turns them on. I only know what I have been told. But, I can speak for men, based on my experiences, and also based on 100’s of men that I have talked to over many, many years.
Surely, someone has written down every possible sexual interest that is known to man. I have not come across such a thing, but I would love to find such a thing. I would love to see a list of possibilities for men as well as women. Maybe it would tap into my analytical side.
I truly believe that many of our sexual interests probably stem from our childhood. Again, I have not studied that at length, it is just my beliefs. I base that on such things as this. For example, I have read that most guys that become gay had the strong interests in that direction for one of two main reasons. One is their first sexual experiences were with men, usually at an early age. So, they associated sexual feelings with guys. The other reason I read was they did not have a good father in their upbringing. So, if this is true, they developed sex interests based on their childhood experiences.
Let me give you another example: myself. At an early age, I had several experiences with girls where we played the game “Show me yours and I will show you mine.” None of those experiences went any further than that. But, those early experiences turned me on greatly. Today, one of my turn ons is the feeling of being exposed to someone that asks to see it, or just exposes me. Let me show you how this plays out with my interest in playing strip poker with my wife.
Occasionally, my wife and I will play strip poker with each other. When we do play, we play it in a way that the loser has to expose themselves on the first time they lose instead of taking that item completely off. Here is what I mean by that. If I lose the hand, then my wife picks the item. So, let’s say she says “Your jeans.” I have to slide my jeans down to my knees only. So, I sit there exposed to her through the next hand. The same thing would happen if she loses and I say “your shirt.” She will just unbutton the shirt, and leave it open until she loses another hand. The biggest turn on for me in this game is when I am almost naked, and I have to push my underwear to my knees and sit like that until I lose another hand. Being exposed like that turns me on greatly, and I will be as hard as a rock, dripping precum. Of course, we continue playing the game when we are naked, whereby we tell each other what they have to do for 4 minutes.
I love playing this strip game, probably because it taps into some of those childhood experiences. Again, I am not a professionally trained counselor, but I am betting that is the connection for me as to why it turns me on so much. It is the same thing when I play around in the car with my wife. She is partially naked (exposed to me) , and I have my pants down, exposed to her. There is something about doing that which is very satisfying to me. And, it goes back to one of my earlier writings that I called “A Husbands Thoughts on what makes sex…” I talked about for sex to be very fulfilling; it needs to have mind fulfillment. Maybe that is at least one reason why I like sex in the car and strip poker.
I think for many men, they wish they had a wife that they could say anything about sex to them. I think they wish they could tell their wives ALL of their sexual interests. Instead, most men hold those things secretly inside of themselves or share them with another guy who they find out likes the same things. I think that is unfortunate because it would be better for the wife to know those things.
But, again, most men I have talked with over the years rarely tell their wives all of their sex interests. They are afraid of being rejected as being a weirdo, or whatever. Some have even told me that they don’t dare say anything to their wives for fear that all of their sex life will stop.
There are an FEW women who are incredible at finding out all of their husband’s sex interests and fantasies. My guess is those women never rejected the husband or made the husband feel weird because of their interests. And, those women probably were open to trying to understand their husband’s sexual interests, and wanted within reason, to help him fulfill his interests.
So, what are the sexual interests of men? Would your husband tell you, or would he hold back and only tell you things he knows you would be open to hearing? Would you reject him, if you knew all of his interests? Would it scare you to know?
Obviously, Christians are limited in the things they can do, or should do, sexually. But, there are many things that your husband might love that may not be in violation to scripture.
Here are some things that guys may like that may be different for some women’s thinking:
Love their ass massaged
Love being in a position of exposed (pants and undies down) and have to sit that way.
Love being put on all fours (hand and knees on the bed) and being stroked (milked) like
Being dominant, or Being submissive
Loved to be asked by the spouse to do something sexual for them. (like “Stroke your cock
Love to be naked as much as possible (almost like they are a home nudist),
Love the idea of masturbating in front of each other
Love their asshole being touched, rubbed
Sex in car, sex outside, sex in the pool, sex in public places (in the woods, dressing room,
Role-plays of all kinds
Use of sex words like cock, pussy, suck, etc
Enjoys wearing panties – Talked to 2 types of guys that like this:
Ones that want to do it to be feminine looking (Kind of wonder how biblical that one is)
Ones that just love how they feel on their cock and how their cock looks in lace.
Enjoy cum (sperm) in various ways. Eating it out of the woman’s pussy, Made to squirt it
on his own face when he cums, or just enjoys watching it shoot out during orgasm.
Stripping each other while dancing with each other during sexy music.
Again, getting to do some of these things may be very fulfilling for the guy for various reasons.
Many times women worry that “If he wants this kind of thing during sex, how much more will he want?” Some of it frightens them. One wife, I talked to was exactly worried about that type of thing.
At times, I have wondered whether it would be an advantage for a naïve woman to get on a sex chat site and listen to all the things that guys say. In less than a year, a woman would learn all the possible thrills of every guy. The problem with that, once again, is it very well may violate scripture. It is just a shame that many christian women are so naïve about sex. The result is their husband suffers.
A christian site like www.marriageheat.com might just be a safer alternative to educating women who did not grow up in an environment where they learned how guys think in regards to sex.